Push and Pull
by Maeve Morgan
Summary: Feeling down after the play, Aang has a talk with his Firebending Master and gains some much needed perspective. Afterwards, he wants to set things right with Katara so that he may concentrate on his fight against the Fire Lord. Set right after The Ember Island Players. Kataang.
1. Chapter One: Guiding Light

**Disclaimer:** Avatar: The Last Airbender, its characters and universe belong to Michael Dante DiMartino, Bryan Konietzko and Nickelodeon. I'm only a fan, writing this for love of this TV show and personal pleasure.

Summary: Feeling down after the play, Aang has a talk with his Firebending Master and gains some much needed perspective. Afterwards, he wants to set things right with Katara so that he may concentrate on his fight against the Fire Lord. Set right after The Ember Island Players.

A.N.: There's such a shift of mood between Aang and Katara from the end of The Ember Island Players to the beginning of The Phoenix King that it's almost like there's an entire episode missing between the two━not to mention the fact that the Gaang decided to postpone confronting Fire Lord Ozai until after the Comet and that Zuko was none the wiser; so there are definitely some missing scenes there and this is my take on it.

* * *

 **Push and Pull**

 _Chapter One: Guiding Light_

"Ugh, worst play ever!" Aang groaned as soon as they walked into the house, removing that stupid hat from his head and carelessly tossing it aside on top of an armchair. Everyone else pretty much murmured agreements as they trudged in after him, but the Airbender noticed with a frown that Zuko was crossing the hall and going straight towards the back of the house while the others had assembled in the living room. "Zuko?"

"I can't sleep right now," the Fire Nation Prince replied curtly over his shoulder, in his customary low, rasping voice. "I'll be in the courtyard." Aang nodded in understanding. No doubt he felt the need to bend some of his frustration away.

"Okay, I'll admit it wasn't the best idea to go see the play," Sokka commented as he sat down on the couch, throwing his arm over Suki's shoulders. "I keep forgetting we're in the Fire Nation and that for them we're the bad guys."

Katara opened her mouth as if she were about to say something, but after a moment she closed it again and just sat down on an armchair, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. She'd wanted to come out and say comforting words, something, anything. But her portrayal in the play as that preachy crybaby with the over-emotional speeches weighed down in her mind and she hesitated long enough to change her mind.

"Well, I knew they hated us," Toph commented as she plopped down on the couch next to Suki, her arm slung over the armrest and dangling over. "But it was still pretty disturbing to hear them all laughing and cheering when 'Azula' and the 'Fire Lord' took down 'Zuko' and 'Aang'."

"It's the Fire Nation's propaganda at its best," Suki explained, with something of a helpless shrug. "Especially in Ember Island that is basically a place only for the Fire Nation elite. They wholly believe that speech that the Fire Lord's war is their way of spreading wealth and happiness with the rest of the world, and in their eyes anyone going against that is only trying to destroy their way of life."

"Ironic how they don't see that their 'spreading wealth and happiness' is destroying the other Nations' way of life," Toph countered darkly.

Aang stood in the doorway between the living room and the hallway, his hands balling into shaking fists. Now he really wished they hadn't gone to see that play. Their completely screwed up portrayals notwithstanding (after all, he got the idea of parody and hyperbole as a form of humor, though he really didn't appreciate that it was at his expense), the worst part had been the quick review of all their past mistakes━all of _his_ past mistakes: Almost failing to protect the Northern Water Tribe, his fall in Ba Sing Se, the whole fiasco that was the invasion. He couldn't help feeling that they were fated for another failure now.

"What if…" Aang said, his eyes down on the floor and his voice barely above a whisper, yet the others all turned their heads to him. "What if they're right?"

"You mean, what if we're the bad guys?" Sokka raised an eyebrow in confusion at him.

"No," Aang said, running his tongue over his dry lips. "I mean, what if they're right and we're going to lose?"

Heavy silence greeted his words. Aang lifted his eyes and instinctively looked across the room at Katara. She was always the voice of reason, the one with the warmest heart in their group and he needed now more than ever to listen to her encouraging words. But as his grey eyes met her blue ones, she averted her gaze, looking down at the floor. A look of pain crossed his face at that.

Sokka had also glanced over at his sister. For as much as he made fun of her for her tearful hopeful speeches, he also relied a lot on her for moral support. She was the one lifting them up when things got real bad, so it was with a frown that he realized the moments were passing and she hadn't spoken up. She wasn't even looking at any of them, her form slumped on the armchair as she hugged her knees up to her chest.

"Look, you can't think like that," Suki then said, as she seemed to sense something weird was happening and that someone needed to fill in the void. "Half the outcome of the battle comes down to our attitude. We can do this."

"But can we?" Aang retorted, still frowning and now looking at Suki. "The Comet is coming in a week. Do you guys feel prepared for that? Because I don't. I still need to master firebending."

"It's true, we could use some more training and preparing," Toph muttered in agreement.

"Hold on," Sokka suddenly said in his tone of voice that indicated he'd had a brilliant idea. "Why do we have to fight the Fire Lord before the Comet comes?"

"I don't know," Aang replied, shrugging his shoulders a little. "Doesn't that seem kind of instinctive? I did go through all that trouble to talk to Avatar Roku back at the winter solstice and get this message that I needed to defeat Fire Lord Ozai before the Comet arrives at the end of summer or the war would be lost."

"Yeah, but technically the war is already lost," Sokka continued with his train of thought. "The Earth Kingdom kinda fell when we lost Ba Sing Se. So I don't get why we're still rushing to meet this Comet deadline."

"Okay, so then when do you propose we fight him?" Toph turned to him with her question.

"How about _after_ the Comet?" Sokka proposed quite simply. "That way we get more time to train and prepare, Aang gets to master firebending and we don't need to face the Fire Lord when he's super extra powerful because of the Comet but only a regular power-crazed Firebender."

"You know, it does make sense," Suki said after a moment of consideration. "And we'd have the element of surprise on our side. He'd never think we would attack them after the Comet; they'll just think we gave up."

"Yeah," Toph nodded in agreement. "We can pick a time and date that is good for us instead of just rushing into battle because of the Comet."

"What do you think, Katara?" Aang asked softly, his eyes seeking her form once more.

The Water Tribe girl had been listening intently to the discussion but had refrained from voicing her opinion so far. She started a little at Aang's question and lifted her eyes to meet his. She offered him a tiny smile as she said, "If it will give you the time you need to master firebending, then I think it's worth it."

Aang acknowledged it with a nod back at her and an impassive expression on his face.

"Okay, that sounds like a plan," Sokka declared, getting up to his feet and stretching his arms over his head. "Well, I don't know about you guys but I'm beat. I think I'm going straight to bed now."

"Yep, quite beat," Suki parroted, also jumping up to her feet and making quite a show of giving a huge yawn. "Good night, everyone!"

She and Sokka hurried out the corridor and up the stairs while the others followed at a more leisurely pace. But when they got to the hallway Aang headed towards the back of the house instead of the stairs. "I'm just going to check on Zuko," he told the girls over his shoulder. "Good night."

"Okay. Good night, Twinkle Toes," Toph called out to him, already mounting up the steps.

"Good night," Katara said quietly as she frowned at his retreating figure, standing for a moment on the first step, her hand paused over the wooden railing as her fingers twitched slightly, before also heading upstairs once Aang walked out of sight.

As the Airbender crossed his way through the big house to the back he couldn't stop thinking about the events of that night. He'd really made a mess of things with Katara this time. He knew he shouldn't have talked to her about the two of them when his frustration got the better of him, but he'd previously tried talking to her at the Western Air Temple and she'd kept deflecting the subject. It seemed like it was never the right time; they were either running for their lives or he was training so hard during the day that at night after dinner he'd promptly go to sleep, completely exhausted, or she was going off in little side adventures to avenge her mother's killer with Zuko. Okay, so that had only happened once, but still.

Aang knew that her avoidance of the subject wasn't a good sign. After all, Katara was nothing if not the very definition of stubborn determination. When she wanted something, she went after it and made it happen. That was how she'd gotten Master Pakku to teach her waterbending or how she'd gotten them all to stay and help that downtrodden fishing town, and it was one of the many things he loved about her. So deep down he knew that if she'd wanted to be with him, she'd already had made it happen.

But try as he might, Aang just couldn't let it go. He couldn't let _her_ go; that had always been his weakness, why he hadn't managed to master the Avatar state. He was so in love with her and he just knew they would be great together. Why couldn't she see what was so clear to him? At times he felt like she did feel the same for him, like that night when they danced at the secret dance party at the cave or when he'd kissed her before the invasion━after all, he _did_ feel her kissing him back. But other times it was like she just kept pulling away from him. And the more he pushed, the more she pulled away.

Still lost in his thoughts, Aang reached the inner courtyard where he and Zuko would usually practice firebending. As he crossed the threshold, he found his firebending Master stripped down to only his pants and engaged in a series of gruelling firebending exercises, as he quickly went from one form to another, fire shooting gracefully out of his hands and feet. After a few moments, Zuko fell into a pattern that Aang recognized from their lessons and he barely hesitated before removing his shoes, coat and shirt and stepping up to accompany his movements.

They spent quite a few minutes in companionable silence as they went through the movements and execution of the different forms. Aang had to admit that Zuko had the right idea; firebending was an excellent way to deal with frustration, as the aggressiveness of handling fire helped him with his convoluted thoughts as he focused everything on the task at hand and tired his body with the physical activity.

Some time later, the two of them were sitting by the fountain, both wiping the sweat from their foreheads and breathing deeply to catch their breaths. Aang leaned back on his hands as he looked up at the night sky, and he said, "Zuko, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah," the Firebender replied curtly as he leaned forward, his elbows supported on his knees as he looked down at the ground.

Aang had meant to ask about the upcoming conflict with the Fire Lord and their idea of waiting for the Comet to come and go. However the words that actually came out once he opened his mouth were, "Is there something going on with you and Katara?"

For his part, Zuko turned his head slightly to look at him with a frown. "What do you mean? Ugh, don't tell me she's back to hating me! What have I done now?" He finished in a woebegone tone, as he turned dejectedly to the ground once more.

"What? No, not that I know of," Aang turned with a frown of his own back at him.

"Then what are you talking about?" Zuko questioned, sitting up a little straighter.

"Well, I mean," Aang said, as he hesitated slightly, one of his hands going up to rub at the back of his head. "I was just thinking about that scene in the play, at the catacombs in Ba Sing Se. Did something━ _is_ something━did the two of you━?"

"Hold on," Zuko interrupted him, holding one of his hands up and his frown becoming more pronounced. "Are you asking me if Katara and I have a _thing_? As in, if we _like_ each other sort of thing?"

"Well, yeah," Aang said, shrugging his shoulders rather sheepishly.

" _No_ ," Zuko said the word emphatically, looking at Aang as if the answer should've been obvious. "I actually have a girlfriend. Or _had_ a girlfriend," he looked thoughtfully up for a moment. "I'm not sure anymore, it's very complicated." He looked back at Aang before continuing. "Anyway, I like Katara but not like that. What even gave you that idea? I mean, she was literally hating my guts up until yesterday!"

"I don't know, I just━," Aang said, huffing the air out of his mouth exasperatedly. "That stupid play and then she said she was confused and argh! I just don't know what to think anymore." He pressed the palms of his hands up against his closed eyes, as he shook his head.

Zuko's frown softened somewhat as he looked at the younger teenager. Not for the first time he wondered how it was that he had ended up in this position, as the older and supposedly wiser person in this ragtag team of teenage prodigies with so much responsibility on their young shoulders. At times like these he really wished Uncle was with them. No doubt he'd have wise and comforting words to help alleviate all the doubt and pain.

The Fire Nation Prince looked up at the sky for a moment as he thought on how he should proceed. He'd tried a few times to channel Uncle and see if he had any wise words or advices, but he had to admit that wasn't his style. He always ended up saying something confusing or inane or, more often than not, both.

So he just decided to be honest and be himself. "Okay, first of all that play was bullshit and you know it," Zuko said, as he glanced down at Aang. "What happened in Ba Sing Se was nothing like that. It was actually worse, at least the way I see it. Katara was nice to me. She offered me comforting words and a hand in friendship, but I turned around and betrayed her. That's why she was having so much trouble trusting me now."

Aang had removed his hands from his face and merely looked up as Zuko talked about all of it. He'd wondered what had happened when he'd found Katara and Zuko back in the catacombs in Ba Sing Se; it had seemed as if he'd interrupted a moment between them but then they never had a chance to talk about it. When Zuko had recently joined them he knew she was the most reluctant of the group to give him a chance and she'd nearly gone ballistic when they'd wanted to go just the two of them to the Sun Warrior's land to find the origins of firebending, but they hadn't actually talked about any of that or gone into details on why she couldn't let go of her anger and distrust of him.

"You said something about her being confused," Zuko continued. "Did she say something about me? I thought we had settled this after going after her mother's killer and when we talked when we first got here on Ember Island."

"No, she didn't say anything about you," Aang explained, once more a soft frown appearing on his countenance. "I had just assumed… I'm sorry, I'm being an idiot." He sighed, leaning back on his hands and looking up at the night sky, the bright moon shining down gently on them.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Zuko then said, not looking at Aang but down at the ground once more. "I mean, I know a thing or two about being an idiot when it comes to girls." He eyed him out of the corner of his good eye and it seemed like a smile tugged at his mouth.

"I don't know," Aang said with some uncertainty. While at same time if felt a little weird to be talking about all of this with Zuko, Aang _had_ been the one to broach the subject. And when he thought about it, who was he going to talk to about this? Katara was out of the question after the disaster he'd made tonight. Sokka, too, for obvious reasons. He had no idea how this conversation would go over with Toph, and while he suspected Suki might actually be good to give him some advice about all of this, it was hard to get her alone long enough without Sokka trailing after her.

"Okay," Aang said at last, breathing out a sigh. "The thing is, I kissed her."

"Tonight?" Zuko found himself raising his eyebrow at this.

"No. I mean, yes! I mean, I did━but I shouldn't have," Aang said, stumbling a little over his words. He took a quick breath in and out. "Let me start over. I kissed her on the day of the eclipse, before the invasion. We'd actually kissed once before, but we never talked about it. We were trapped in a tunnel and it was dark and there was this legend… Anyway, we kissed and I'd been trying to get her to talk about it ever since, but she's always avoiding it and saying how I need to focus on firebending and the war and everything else. But tonight that stupid play got to me and I finally asked her if she just thought of me as a little brother."

"And? What did she say?" Zuko asked, gently probing as Aang had reached a lull in his narrative.

"That's when she said she didn't know and that she was confused," he said as he slumped over, placing his elbows on his knees and leaning his chin on his hands, frowning down at the ground. "I don't get why she's confused. I know I'm not crazy, I felt her kissing me back those other times. And I _know_ we're in the middle of a war and there are important things we have to do. But to me there's nothing more important than Katara and how I feel about her."

"Wow," Zuko breathed out, and Aang turned to look at him, finding the older guy looking intently at him. "That's deep. _And_ heavy."

"It's the truth," Aang replied, merely shrugging his shoulder as if it were simple as that.

"Okay, I get that," Zuko nodded at him after a moment. "I understand where you're coming from. But just stop for a minute and try to understand why putting that out there for her now might make her a little conflicted. We _are_ in the middle of a war and she probably doesn't want you getting distracted. We all need to focus everything we have so that we can end this fight, once and for all."

"I know," Aang heaved a sigh. "It was stupid and selfish of me to bring this up to her now, I get that. But I can't help but feel like… What if I don't come back?" He looked straight back at Zuko, his grey eyes shining brightly like the near full moon above them. "Then she would never know how I feel about her. And if this is the only time I get to be with her, then I want that."

Zuko couldn't help but stare in wonder at him. Sometimes his brain found it hard to connect the fact that the kid before him was the Avatar. Aang was just too young, too silly, easygoing and goofy. But then he'd see him in action when he was fighting and bending and it was such an incongruous image, how this kid could have and command so much power. But as Zuko looked at him now as Aang talked of love and life and death and he seemed so sure and calm about it all, he'd never looked so much like someone way older than his earthly years.

"You think I'm being stupid," Aang said as he frowned once more, misreading Zuko's silence at his words.

"No," Zuko replied quickly, blinking down at him and coming out of his private reverie. "No, I don't think so. I think you're really brave."

"Yeah, right," Aang retorted derisively, looking down once more, thinking he was being condescending.

"I mean it," Zuko insisted, infusing his voice with sincerity. "You know what you feel and you're not afraid to show it. But you know, not everyone is like that. Most people are afraid of letting others know how they feel, of letting other people in. It takes a lot of guts to be so open and honest like you are."

"Well, thanks, I guess," Aang replied, smiling a little at him beside himself.

"That said, you can't expect Katara to be like you," Zuko continued, trying to give some perspective to the younger guy. "Even if she does have feelings for you, and I believe she does, she's probably just afraid of losing you. So she's right, you know, you can't afford to be distracted right now. You need to give all you got into training and getting better and preparing to face my father. You can't go into battle thinking you're not coming back."

"Yeah, Suki said the same thing," the Airbender commented with a somewhat crooked smile. "Wait, so you actually think Katara has feelings for me?" He perked up as the words registered in his brain and he looked up at Zuko.

"You're missing the point here," Zuko barked out sharply in impatience, causing Aang to grimace at his tone. "It doesn't matter if I think she has feelings for you or not. That's not what's important. You need to focus on what you're going to do _now_ to make sure you do come back and then you can see it for yourself."

"Okay, I understand," Aang said, an intense look in his eyes as he nodded seriously back at Zuko. A moment later, however, his concentrated look broke into a sheepish grin as he said, "But just so we're clear, you _do_ think she has feelings for me?"

" _Aang_ ," Zuko exclaimed in exasperation, as he frowned at him. Then he sighed and his expression softened as he said, "I do. You know, she threatened to kill me if I so much as lifted a finger against you when I first joined you. Let me tell you, I _believed_ her."

"Huh," Aang merely said in reply, blinking up his eyes at him as for a moment he didn't know what to think. "But that could be just because I'm the Avatar and all."

"No, I think it's more than that," Zuko said, shaking his head slightly. "Just trust me on this, okay? I saw the way she looked and reacted when Azula shot you down in Ba Sing Se. She's probably terrified something like that is going to happen again." A shiver seemed to run down his back at these words, so he turned back to Aang with a very serious look in his golden eyes. "So you _can't_ let that happen again, got it?"

Aang paused for a few moments, letting his words sink in and thinking of everything he'd said. "All right. Thank you, Zuko. I promise I won't let that happen." He got up and bowed before him, making the traditional Fire Nation greeting with his hands.

"Good," Zuko nodded gravely back at him, and then pushed himself off the fountain, standing up once more and also bowing respectfully at him. "Now let's get some sleep. I want us to get up early and focus on training. I want to start you on some more advanced firebending."

"Yes, Sifu Hotman." A sly smile tugged at the corner of Aang's lips.

"I already told you to stop calling me that." Zuko's own lips twitched at the corners.

The two of them gathered their discarded pieces of clothing and headed back inside the house.


	2. Chapter Two: Soothing Water

**Disclaimer:** Avatar: The Last Airbender, its characters and universe belong to Michael Dante DiMartino, Bryan Konietzko and Nickelodeon. I'm only a fan, writing this for love of this TV show and personal pleasure.

Summary: Feeling down after the play, Aang has a talk with his Firebending Master and gains some much needed perspective. Afterwards, he wants to set things right with Katara so that he may concentrate on his fight against the Fire Lord. Set right after The Ember Island Players.

A.N.: I'd originally intended for this to be a one-shot, but the story was becoming too long so I decided to split it into chapters, with this one covering what happens with Aang and Katara.

* * *

 **Push and Pull**

 _Chapter Two: Soothing Water_

Aang laid on his bed in one of the guest bedrooms of Zuko's family's summer house on Ember Island, one hand under his head and the other thrown across his bare stomach, as he was only wearing his pants to sleep, as usual. He'd been tossing and turning for a while now, ever since he'd come up after the conversation he'd had with his firebending Master out in the courtyard following their impromptu firebending practice. He'd intended on sleeping and seeing how he'd feel come the light of a new day, however sleep was eluding him. He sat up, folding his legs in the lotus position and placing his hands over his knees as he tried meditating to clear his mind, but even though he'd worked out considerably with Zuko earlier he still felt his body was full of nervous energy.

As meditating wasn't working and he felt it was a waste of time to just roll around in bed, Aang got up to his feet and decided to take a walk down to the beach. He silently made his way through the sleeping household, thinking back on the conversation he'd had with Zuko earlier that night.

Ever since Zuko had shown up wanting to join them and teach the Avatar firebending Aang had been pleasantly surprised by getting to know his firebending Master and new friend. He was glad they had come around and let the Fire Nation Prince join them; from the very start Aang had felt his and Zuko's destinies were entwined. At first, it seemed it was so because it was the banished Prince's mission to capture the Avatar. But during that incident when Aang had found out that the Blue Spirit was actually Zuko he'd had that feeling that they should've been friends, not enemies. It took some time, but now they were in the right path. And he was glad that Zuko was not only teaching him firebending, but also helping him deal with other things.

The more he thought about it, the more Aang realized how much of a mess he'd made with Katara. For starters, he'd never actually confessed his feelings for her, he'd just kissed her and gone on his way to fight the Fire Lord. He'd thought the kiss was enough, and he'd been glad when she kissed him back, but maybe he should've used words instead of imposing himself on her. That was definitely what he should have done tonight instead of kissing her again (like an idiot) just when she'd said she was confused about the two of them. What had he been thinking?

And what Zuko had told him was also weighing down in his mind now. If Katara was afraid of losing him in the war, it would make sense that she'd be confused about being with him. He hadn't realized how much she'd been affected when Azula had shot him down in Ba Sing Se. He had vague recollections of waking up in her arms, her blue eyes shining brightly as copious tears had coursed down her face and a relieved smile had come upon her lips. They hadn't really talked about how that had made her feel, he'd only thought she was so amazing for being able to bring him back and how lucky he was to have her with him.

Aang needed to make things right. Katara could barely look at him anymore and he couldn't let things remain like this. Come morning he'd find her and talk to her, _really_ talk to her and apologize to her for being such an idiot. He wanted to confess what he felt for her without asking for a response from her. He just wanted her to know the truth and that it was okay if she was confused, because he was going to really focus on what he needed to do to get ready and face the Fire Lord to end the war. And then they could talk after he came back.

He was going to come back. He had to.

He'd been so focused on these thoughts, looking up at the starlit sky, his feet carrying him lightly down towards the beach that he suddenly stopped short when he finally looked at the ocean. The sight that greeted his eyes was not one he was expecting, for standing waist-deep in the gentle waves was Katara.

She had on the light blue undergarments she usually wore when they'd practice waterbending, her hair was loose and she had her eyes closed as she moved with the ocean as if they were one and the same, the just waning full moon standing up in the background. With a graceful arc of her arms she commanded the waters, as a stream flowed in the air towards her hands, gathering in a huge, spinning sphere above her head. Another movement of her arms and a swish of her hips later and the water sphere was dispersing, falling all around her as crystalline shards of snowflakes that melted instantly as they came in contact with the warmer ocean waters. She repeated these movements a few times, almost like a dance, and just as the snowflakes were raining down on her once more she opened her eyes and looked right at him.

"Aang," Katara gasped, coming to a sudden halt in her movements, one of her hands pressing against her heart and her blue eyes going wide, the water sphere exploding out in a shower of brilliant snowflakes above and all around her.

Aang realized he was staring, but for a moment longer he couldn't stop himself. She looked so beautiful and mesmerizing, and he'd felt spellbound, unable to move, think or even breathe as he had simply stood and watched her entrancing movements, the water moving around her at her slightest command. "Wow," he rasped out, realizing he was actually out of breath (he, an Airbender, out of breath!) and trying to gather his wits about himself. "That was amazing."

"Thanks," she smiled a little self-consciously, running her hands through her hair as a light blush colored her cheeks. She remained where she stood, swaying gently with the motions of the ocean that had returned to its natural rhythm now that she'd stopped her bending. "What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep," he said, running one hand on the back of his neck as he came up to the water, but he stopped short of letting his feet touch it as he stood instead on the wet sand. For some reason if he came any closer it'd feel like he was invading her space, and he wanted to be very careful with that.

"Yeah, me neither," she said, her smile becoming a little crooked as she shrugged after a moment, her hands tracing lazy paths on the surface of the swaying water around her. "I think it's still too close to the full moon, I could almost feel it calling to me. I just felt like I needed to be near the water."

"Ah, that makes sense," Aang commented, nodding his head in agreement. For a moment he wondered if that was also the reason why he hadn't been able to fall asleep and for the nervous energy he felt running through his body. He felt considerably better now that he was at the beach, but he couldn't tell if that was because he was by the water or because he was talking to Katara. He didn't want things to go awkward again, so he kept on talking. "Don't let me stop you from what you were doing; you seemed really into it."

"I was just playing around," she said, once more shrugging her shoulders casually.

"I mean it, that was incredible," he said, a smile lighting up in his face. "Master Pakku would be really proud. You became an amazing Waterbender Master!"

His words seemed to have the opposite effect on her than what he'd hoped for, as her smile slid off her face and she said, "I'm not so sure about that."

"Why?" Aang found himself frowning at her across the water.

"I…" Katara said, the rest of her words seeming to die in her throat, her blue eyes glistening over with pain and sadness. She averted his eyes, turning her body away a little, wrapping her arms protectively around herself.

"Katara? What is it?" Any hesitation of approaching her he might have felt disappeared as soon as he saw the pained look in her eyes, and Aang stepped resolutely forward, using some bending so that in instants he was also waist-deep in the water, standing before her.

She looked at him out of the corner of her eye, but kept her body angled away from him. He noticed this and her hesitation and a pained look crossed his face. "Look, I'm sorry," he breathed out, and at his words she turned back to face him, blinking her eyes at him. "I know I made a mess out of things between us, but you need to know I never wanted to cause you any pain. You're my best friend and I hate that you can't even look at me right now." His eyes darted downwards, his voice weighed down with sorrow.

"Wait, Aang," she said, frowning a little at him. "It's not what you think. This isn't about…" She trailed off, not knowing exactly which words to use to refer to their current situation. "I mean, I couldn't look at you because I didn't want to see _you_ being disappointed in _me_."

"You could never disappoint me," he said, looking back at her and smiling a little sadly. "I'm the one who's being a complete idiot about everything. I feel like I've let you down."

"No, Aang, you don't understand," she tried again, shaking her head slightly. "This isn't about us. I've━There's something I didn't tell you. When Zuko and I went after my mother's killer, I did something…"

"What?" He asked, keeping his face neutral as he searched her eyes. If this wasn't about the weirdness between them because of their earlier conversation about the two of them but something about her mother's killer, then he wanted to be there for her, like she'd always been there for him. She bit down on her lower lip and still hesitated, so he quietly reached out and grabbed her hands in his, and said, "Katara, whatever it is, you can tell me. You know that. I'm not going to judge you or stop being your friend, no matter what you do."

"I used bloodbending," she breathed out, speaking it out loud before she lost her nerve, her eyes looking down from his and going towards their hands. She almost instinctively wanted to let go, but he felt that and gripped her hands a little tighter in his, and she felt reassured by the gesture, continuing to tell him what had happened, though she still avoided his eyes. "When we found the current leader of the Southern Raiders and I'd thought he was the one who killed my mother and I was finally going to face him, I just… I was filled with so much rage, and I could _feel_ him. I could feel the full moon and the pulse of the ocean and the blood flowing through his veins and I…" She shook her head, tears coursing down her face, but the words kept pouring out of her, as she needed to get this off her chest. "I felt so entitled, like I had all the power over him and that I could do whatever I wanted, like it was my _right_ to do that. And it turned out he wasn't even the one who killed my mom. Then I felt so wrong and dirty and disgusted with myself. I had said I'd never use bloodbending again, yet at the first opportunity I could, I just gave in to the urge and I reached in and violated someone else." Her lips were trembling as she finished saying it.

"Oh Katara," Aang said softly as she finally took a breath after all the words had rushed out of her. "I'm so sorry. Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"You were so glad that I spared my mother's killer, I didn't want you to be disappointed in me for doing something so horrible," she said with a helpless shrug, still more tears running down her face.

"Okay, stop," he said with a smile, squeezing her hands in his and she looked up into his grey eyes. "I meant what I said: You could never disappoint me. The fact that you're so full of remorse shows you deeply regret your actions. We're not perfect, because we're human so we're bound to make mistakes, especially when we're taken over by negative and powerful emotions like rage. But mistakes are how we grow and learn and become better. Now you need to find the strength within, which I know you have, to forgive yourself and move on."

"I don't know if I can, Aang," she confessed, speaking softly as if she were afraid of the very words. "I feel like I'm tainted now, like I'm no longer just a Waterbender, but that I'll be defined as a Bloodbender, and I _hate_ that."

"I know, but you need to let go of that hate, too," Aang said, and Katara tilted her head at him with a somewhat confused frown. "The monks had a saying: 'Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love'. Self-hate is also a form of hate, and one of the worst. Please try to treat yourself as if you would a friend; love and forgive yourself. You're so _good_ , Katara. One mistake is not going to change who you are. I _know_ that."

"How can you be so sure?" She found herself asking this, despite herself, with some doubt in her voice.

"Because I know you," he said simply, smiling at her.

Katara couldn't help but roll her eyes a little at him, even though a smile was also forming on her lips. "I think you might be a bit biased."

"Maybe I am," Aang conceded readily, still with a smile. "But I've also been a witness to how _great_ you are. You're the girl who got herself _arrested_ and into a _Fire Nation prison_ just so she could help break out a friend. You wouldn't let pirates or a backwards, sexist tradition keep you from learning waterbending because you wanted to know how to fight to protect the ones you love. You'd never turn your back on people who need you, even going so far as to trick your friends just so you could secretly help out an entire village. And you've always been there for me, calming me down and bringing me back from the Avatar state when I'd lose myself and almost destroy everything in a fit of rage."

As she heard his candidly spoken words, Katara could only stare at him, her lips slightly parted in wonder. It was one of those moments when his old soul and wisdom would simply shine through, when he no longer looked like that goofy and at times insecure kid. He seemed older and so mature, and she would get a glimpse of the man he'd grow up to be. She wondered if it was because he was an Air Nomad or because he was the Avatar or if it was entirely unrelated and just Aang being Aang.

"So you see, I know a lot about losing control, making mistakes and having regrets," he continued, looking down with embarrassment for a moment, but he quickly looked back up into her eyes. "You can always talk to me, about anything. If you let me, I'll listen and try to help you in any way I can, as you always did that for me."

Katara then moved suddenly, dropping his hands and throwing her arms around him with a quiet sob, closing her eyes and laying her head on his shoulder. Aang widened his eyes a little at this, but his arms quickly encircled her form, hugging her close to him and smiling into her hair. They just stood like this for a while, locked in each other's arms with the just waning moon shining down on them, the gentle sway of the waves swirling around them as they felt the push and pull of the ocean.

"Thank you," she said quietly into his ear, and felt an involuntary shiver run down his spine at this. "Thank you for being here for me, for saying all of that and for being my best friend."

Aang just nodded silently at her and she pulled back slightly, pressing their foreheads together for a moment and then she opened her brilliant blue eyes and looked into his bright grey ones. "Hum at the risk of ruining this totally great moment between us," he said, pulling back even further, though his arms remained encircling her waist, and giving her a crooked smile. "I do still need to properly apologize for what happened earlier. I'm sorry, Katara, for pushing you and for kissing you when you said you were confused."

"It's okay, Aang," she said as she smiled gently back at him, her cheeks tainted a light pink. "I understand what you were trying to do."

"It was still so wrong of me to do that," he insisted, a very serious look on his face now. "And you were right, you know. We _are_ in the middle of a war and I need to focus and do everything I can to prepare to face Ozai."

"We all do," she nodded in agreement back at him, glad he'd understood what she'd told him. "I'm not going anywhere, I'll be here and I'll help you all the way through."

"I know," he grinned back at her. "You've been with me from the very start, helping me through so much already. And I need to tell you…"

"Aang," she said, some hesitation and a bit of a warning in her voice, a delicate frown forming between her eyebrows.

"I'm going to come back," he said, a very serious and focused look in his eyes as he stared intently into hers. "I'm going to face Ozai and I'll come back from the battle. And then we can talk about us and everything else. So you don't need to worry about that."

Katara felt her breath hitching in her throat. "You promise?" She whispered the question at him, almost afraid to ask him that.

"I promise," Aang smiled reassuringly at her. "I love you, you know." He said, catching her completely off guard with his almost-casual confession, just the barest of blushes coloring his cheeks. "I've always loved you, from the moment you got me out of the ice and I woke up in your arms. It just took me long enough to realize that. And you don't need to tell me anything in return, I'm not asking you to be with me right now or anything. I just wanted you to know."

"Aang," she breathed out his name, feeling a bit breathless at his words. She was glad he still had his arms around her and that they were surrounded by her element, both giving her frame some sort of support, as she actually felt a bit dizzy and weak in the knees.

"It's okay, Katara," he replied with a smile and the same quiet reassurance as before. "I've waited a hundred years for you, I think I can wait a while longer."

"Wow." She blinked up her eyes at him. For a few moments she just opened and closed her lips but no sounds came out.

"Are you okay?" Aang asked her, but he was looking at her with amusement gleaming in his grey eyes.

"I think I'm speechless," she finally choked out, laughter in her voice as she lightly shook her head. "You managed to make the girl with all the speeches speechless."

"I know. That was pretty smooth, huh?" He grinned at her, waggling his eyebrows up and feeling rather proud of himself.

"It really was," she laughed back at him, her blue eyes sparkling in delight.

"I was surprised I managed to pull it off and didn't ruin it by saying the wrong words or something," he confessed with a laughter of his own, one of his hands going up to scratch at the back of his head. "I usually just end up putting my foot in my mouth."

"Well, no foot in your mouth this time," Katara assured him, her laughter subsiding to a gentle smile, but her eyes were still sparkling at him. "Aang, I━"

"I meant it when I said you didn't need to say anything," he said hurriedly, interrupting whatever it was that she was going to say. "I don't want you to say it back if you're not sure."

"I _am_ sure," she countered quickly. "I don't want you to think that I'm not or that I don't, I just…" She trailed off, biting her lip and her eyes sliding off of his, looking down as she tried to come up with the words to explain everything she wanted to tell him.

"You're just scared, right?" He finished the thought for her, smiling a bit sadly but also in understanding, and she looked back into his eyes. "Believe me, I get it. I'm scared, too. But you know what scares me the most? The thought of losing you, my best friend."

"Then you have nothing to be scared of, because you're never gonna lose me. I'll always be your best friend," Katara replied softly, her voice full of promise.

"Good, because that's the person I need the most right now. I wouldn't be able to do this without you," Aang said. "I need you as the constant calm by my side, my waterbending Master, the voice of reason, tearful hopeful speeches and all." He finished with a teasing grin and playful raise of the eyebrows.

"Okay, then you got me," Katara assured him with a grin of her own, leaning forward and placing a teasing, tender kiss on his cheek, growing delighted as she retreated and saw his face become bright red. Honestly, she'd never get tired of having this effect on him. As he rubbed a hand embarrassedly at the back of his head, she removed her arms from around him and said, "And since you mentioned it and we're already here, how about some waterbending practice? I don't want you getting rusty just because Zuko is getting all your time these days."

"You're on," he replied right away, narrowing his eyes playfully at her and taking a few steps back, already adopting a defensive stance. The next moment, he dodged quickly as she bent a well-aimed attack at him with a swift movement of her arms.

They spent some time practicing, though truthfully their serious waterbending session quickly morphed into just playful waterbending splashing in the water and spending time together, enjoying each other's company. Soon they grew tired and sleepy, but instead of going back up to the house, they just fell asleep in each other's arms on the sand. Feeling the warmth of Katara's body next to him, Aang knew he still had a lot of challenges to face up ahead, but now he felt calmer and reassured that he'd find a way, somehow.

* * *

A.N.: Okay, so this did not go where I'd expected, yet I love so much how it turned out. I originally intended for an apologetic, contrite Aang and understanding Katara. I may be projecting a little (or a lot), but I feel like Aang shows the best of him when he stops worrying about his own problems and insecurities and instead just tries to be there for his friends when they're troubled. I had been focusing a lot on Katara's feelings with my stories, so it felt nice to get inside Aang's head. A vulnerable Katara and a supportive Aang seemed like the right way to go to fix the situation between them, and it also bothered me that they never showed her talking to anyone about her bloodbending in The Southern Raiders. I think what I love the most about them is that they're friends before anything else, and I tried to show that here. I'd love to know your thoughts on this!


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